Red shorts and noodles

Do you know something, earning a living from doing the shows is like playing roulette. Or even worse it's like a very long drawn out version of heads and tails. This last week was an example of that.

We had a very busy week getting prepared for this weekend's shows as my show started on the Thursday.  

Now in true British fashion we went from cold to boiling hot this week, I was slightly concerned because I was going to be stood inside my gazebo which is black for 3 days... 

My word I got set up early Thursday morning at a horse trial event and found that the sun was pointing directly at me. I spoke to my neighbour as I pulled up to ask him something and he mumbled some couldn't be arsed response. I thought great I'm getting frazzled by the sun and I've got a grumpy buggar next to me for 4 days.. As it turned out Al next door was great company and was a slightly older version of me, we had very similar ethics and morals etc routinely cutting oir noses off to spite our faces. Ill give you an example, the coffee man at the show was the same as at a previous show, I had been and purchased coffee lots of times and everytime I went up to him he spoke to me like he had never seen me before. So I did what I do well and refused to buy anothet coffee despite loving a cup of coffee and desparetley wanting one, even when Al offered me a coffee I refused because I was making a stand. Writing that down even I think I am pathetic but you know what, I would do the same again.

Thursday at the show was so quiet and so hot. I was sat in a sweatbox  doing absolutely nothing. Some friends came for a couple of hours and treated me to an ice cream which was lovely, I packed up early and got out of there.

Friday I went to help my wife set her Gazebo up as it was just down the road from my show. Literally 1 minute after getting out the car I was kicked for being rude to her neighbours..Now either I am getting worse as I get older and morphing into a Victor Meldrew (with a full head of hair!) or her tolerance levels have lowered. I think after 22 years of being together it's probably a bit of both. I did have a bit of a chuckle when she came home and said her neighbours had down her head in all day..maybe I'm just a good judge of character after all.

Anyway I had a couple of ridiculously hot days not doing much in the Gazebo, everyone said the show gets busy on the weekend. So waited patiently for Saturday to come and again very started out well. Lots more people and made some sales early on, happy days then I think it became too hot for people to shop and I can't blame them. I did quite enjoy watching the show jumping. I had a text from the family to say they had a thunder storm which was only 30 minutes away from where I was. Guess what 30 minutes later the sky's turned black and we had an amazing storm, it hammered it down. I was a knight in shining armour and protected some horsey mum's in my gazebo. Now I have been known to strip off and run in the rain in my boxers but for the sake of the business and the ladies in my gazebo I resisted the urge to do so. If you've never ran in a storm in  your underwear I highly recommend it, it's very liberating. 

On the Saturday afternoon a very young girl on a bike came to the stand, she must of been  around 10 or 11. She said "please may I buy a chocolate vodka?" She had the money in her hand...errr no I said laughing, she said don't worry it's not for me..I did laugh and told her to bring a grown up. A couple of hours later a lady came up and said her daughter wanted to buy one earlier for her pony teacher, I said she was too young and the lady laughed and said I never thought of that! That's a new one for me.

The storm did clear the air for a while. 

Sunday was very similar to the other days, too warm to shop. I decided at 4pm to pack up and go home. I can't do anymore..then the most bizarre thing started happening. People started to buy things.. Now I can't explain it but when I have ripped down half the stand. Most of the stock was in the car. I have sweat running off my nose and people wanted to buy bottles. One man bought 8 bottles. So i was then running a car boot sale and selling bottles out the back of my car. Was quite good fun. If I had known that's all it took I could of sat in the car with the air con on selling instead of my torturous sweat box.

I then got a phone call from the Mrs who was at a show near Newbury, she had had an amazing day but didn't have enough stock for the following day. So as I looked at my car full of stock there was only one thing for it..a 3 hour drive to Newbury. A quick out stop on the way at home for overnight stuff then off I went. I had a lovely Gin and Tonic when I arrived at 9pm then collapsed into bed. This then meant i got to spend the day at her show with her. When I walked into her marque with her I was greeted with "what the bloody hell are you doing here?" Followed by "what the F#$k are you wearing?" You know your in good company when greeted like that... 

It seems my red shorts and skinny legs proved quite a hit at the show. With both stall holders and even customers giving me stick.. Steve cheese customer was the funniest when I heard them talking and the lady said Red shorts and noodle legs..who on earth would choose that. Was a fun day and I got to see a lot of the show and catch up with people I wouldn't get chance too. I then packed the stall up and got home around 8.30 only 30 minutes after my wife. So then our bank holiday started at 9pm when we chilled for half an hour before going to bed. Ready for the 4am alarm to start it all over again





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